SANTA CLAUS IS WIELDING A GUN
          (to the tune of "Santa Claus Is Coming to Town")

     Oh, you better watch out
     You better not pry
     You better stay back
     I'm telling you why
     Santa Claus is wielding a gun

     He's making a list
     And checking it twice
     Gonna find out who
     He's gonna ice
     Santa Claus is wielding a gun

     Don't give him any trouble
     He'll blow you right away
     Don't give him any cause to shoot
     Or you'll make his Christmas Day

     Oh, you better believe
     He's packing a rod
     No coal in your stocking
     Just lead in your bod
     Santa Claus is wielding a gun

     He doesn't want cookies
     Or none of that crud
     He doesn't want milk
     What he wants is your blood
     Santa Claus is wielding a gun

     (Music Bridge, with automatic arms fire)

     He doesn't trust nobody
     Shot all his reindeer dead
     Thought Dancer was a sissy
     And thought Rudolph was a red

     Oh, you better watch out
     You better not pry
     You better stay back
     I'm telling you why

     Santa Claus is wielding a gun