The Top 14 Pickup Lines in Prison
  
  14> "Damn, you are sexy in stripes."
  
  13> "Is that a zip-gun carefully carved out of a piece of
       discarded metal found on the floor of the prison
       license-plate manufacturing shop in my pocket,
       or am I just glad to see you?"
  
  12> "You know, normally I don't give in the first 30 seconds,
       but I guess I'm a sucker for sheer muscle mass."
  
  11> "Nice teeth.  They'd look so much better on the floor
       of my cell."
  
  10> "Who wants to marry a multiple murderer?"
  
   9> "I've been watching you from across the yard for awhile
       now, and I knew if I didn't work up the courage to just
       walk over here and ask you to be my bitch, I might regret
       it for the rest of my life."
  
   8> "Hold still while I staple this centerfold to the back
       of your head."
  
   7> "Did you order the Soap Drop soup?"
  
   6> "That orange jumpsuit really brings out the red in your
       freshly-healed knife wound."
  
   5> "Care to give Prisoner Johnson a weekend furlough?"
  
   4> "You're new here... let me debrief you and introduce you
       to the penal system."
  
   3> "You look even better in person than you did on America's
       Most Wanted."
  
   2> "If looks could kill, you'd get 25 to life."
  
   1> "Is your name 'Escape Tunnel'?  Because I've been digging
       you all night."