An old man wonders away from a nursing home. It is getting evening time and he comes up upon a bar that looked friendly enough. He no sooner got inside when a young lady came up to him and ask: "Would you like a drink?" "I sure would" he responded. Then she ask him if he wanted to dance and he quickly agreed. They were not on the dance floor very long and she wispered in his ear: "Would you like to go home with me?" "Wow, that's the best deal yet, sure would!"

The next morning he went to confession and said to the priest: "I am 85 years old, and I spent last night with a 28 year old woman." The priest thought about it and decided that an 85 year old man couldn't have done much damage and said: "Go say, 10 Hail Marys." The man responded: "I can't do that I am Jewish." To which the preist responded: "What are you doing talking to me?" "Are you kidding," replied the old man, "I am 85. I am telling everybody I can!"