Special Note to all my Bill Clinton Fans and supporters--Please consider
giving as much as possible to this worthwhile cause
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Subject: Bill Clinton
Dear Friend & Public Minded Citizen,
We, the undersigned, have the distinguished honor of being on the
committee to raise five million dollars for erection of a monument for
Bill Clinton. Although we originally wanted to put him on Mt. Rushmore,
until we discovered there was not enough room for two more faces. We
then decided to erect a statue of Bill Clinton in the Washington, DC
Hall of Fame. We were in a quandary as to where the statue should be
placed. It was not to be placed beside the statue of George Washington,
who never told a lie, or beside Jesse Jackson, who never told the truth.
Since Bill Clinton could never tell the difference, we finally decided
to place the statue beside Christopher Columbus, the greatest Democrat
of them all. He left not knowing where he was going, did not know where
he was when he got there, returned not knowing where he had been, and
did it all on someone else's money.
Moses said to the children of Israel, "Pick up your shovels, mount
your asses and camels, and I will lead you to the promised land." Nearly
5,000 years later, Franklin D. Roosevelt said, "Lay down your shovels,
sit on your asses, light up a camel, this is the promised land." Now,
Bill Clinton is going to steal your shovels, tax your asses, raise the
price of your camels, and mortgage the promised land.
If you are one of the fortunate people who have anything left after
paying taxes, we expect a generous contribution to this worthwhile
project.
Thank You,
Bill Clinton Monument Committee
P.S. It is said that Bill Clinton is considering changing the
Democratic Party symbol from a donkey to a condom, because it stands for
inflation, protects a bunch of members, halts production, and gives you
a false sense of security while you are being screwed.
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