If Airlines Were Based on Operating Systems:

UNIX Airways:

Everyone brings one piece of the plane along when they come to the
airport. They all go out on the runway and put the plane together piece
by piece, arguing nonstop about what kind of plane they are supposed to 
bebuilding.

Air DOS:

Everybody pushes the airplane until it glides, then they jump on and let 
the plane coast until it hits the ground again. Then they push again, jump 
on again, and so on.


Mac Airlines:

All the stewards, captains, baggage handlers, and ticket agents look and 
act exactly the same. Every time you ask questions about details, you are 
gently but firmly told that you don't need to know, don't want to know, and 
everything will be done for you without your ever having to know, so just 
shut up.


Windows Air:

The terminal is pretty and colorful, with friendly stewards, easy baggage 
check and boarding, and a smooth takeoff. After about 10 minutes in the 
air, the plane explodes with no warning whatsoever.


Windows NT Air:

Just like Windows Air, but costs more, uses much bigger planes, and takes 
out all the other aircraft within a 40-mile radius when it explodes.


Linux Air:

Disgruntled employees of all the other OS airlines decide to start their 
own airline. They build the planes and ticket counters, and pave the 
runways themselves. They charge a small fee to cover the cost of printing 
the ticket, but you can also download and print the ticket yourself. When 
you board the plane, you are given a seat, four bolts, a wrench, and a copy 
of the seat-HOWTO.html. Once settled, the fully adjustable seat is very 
comfortable, the plane leaves and arrives on time without a single problem, 
the in-flight meal is wonderful. You try to tell customers of the other 
airlines about the great trip, but all they can say is:  "You had to do 
what with the seat?"